Michael Jackson is More Fucked Up Than We Thought!

Wacko Jacko likes to drink his wine in an emptied out Diet Coke can. He's quite the sly lush apparently. His accuser was also given wine to drink and was found to be intoxicated on numerous occasions by various people on the Neverland Ranch. The alleged victim says that he was given wine by the wacko one and it was called 'Jesus Juice'. He also fed them Bacardi, Skyy vodka, tequila and Jim Beam.


During a flight, the accusers brother says that Michael killed time by making obscene phone calls. The child says that Michael asked one person, "Does your pussy stink?" (What's he doing thinking about pussy anyhow?)
It is also on the same flight that Michael apparently drank himself silly and according to the accusers mother and brother, while the child slept Michael licked his face. (Hey Mom, get a fucking CLUE!)
TheSmokingGun.com has numerous transcripts and shit that you should check out!

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Britney Gets Pissy

Britney has her thong in a wad over the recent cover of US magazine.
The pics are of the newlywed couple on their honeymoon last October.

Britney was quoted as saying, "Kevin and I chose a resort location where we were promised absolute privacy and seclusion. Unfortunately, staff members took photographs of us, which we allowed them to take once we were assured they were being taken only for private use in a scrap book they gave us as a souvenir."
She also mentioned that other magazines, including Star, took the high road and did not publish the pictures.
So what did US Magazine have to say about why they did it? Just listen to this..hardy har har...
"Coming from a celebrity who sold pictures of both her wedding and her stepdaughter, it's unlikely the issue here is privacy. Could it be that Britney is seeing red after not seeing the green from these photos? Britney Spears should start a magazine if she'd like to dictate her own coverage." BAM!

Anorexia by Allegra

With the money that her uncle, Giovanni Versace left her you'd think the girl could afford to eat. Haven't seen recent pics of her since last summer. Wonder if she has gained any weight? Boy, her clothes sure hang nicely though don't they?

Allegra's mother is Donatella Versace, Giovanni's sister. (You know, the drunk, powder sniffin designer with the savage tan, blonde extensions and huge cheeks implants.) I wonder if Allegra has a Hoover nose too?

The Other White Meat

Makes Me Hungry!

Drea Di Matteo, Battin' For Both Teams

Lucky for both teams! Drea recently admitted to loving & dating men, but she occasionally loves to frolick with girlfriends.


Is it just me or does she look a lot like a brunette Portia?


The eyebrows, the 'I could fuck the shit out of you' sneer...

Joan Rivers - The Mask

Holy shit, everytime I see 'the mask' I am floored.
Joan & her daughter Melissa were the hosts of the TV Guide's Music Awards pre-show. Isn't is absolutely hideous how Joan has less wrinkles on her face than her daughter? Just how much tighter can you pull her face? Pretty soon her tits will be around her ears janglin' like earrings.


YIKES!


Joan, try not to smile too much, you'll tear the seam!